How To Be Smart About Fashion

I am now in London where I plan to be based for a while, and moving has been inspiring some breakthroughs, in terms of understanding myself better and also coming up with life hacks.

I will share them here over the next couple of weeks (there is still that War and Peace post I promised about Holland vs UK, I remember!). Let me start with the shallowest and the smallest.

You can not live in London and not be aware of fashion. It’s another official language of the capital – impeccable, achingly cool, highly individual, yet with subtle commonalities recognisable to others in the tribe. Londoners may be wearing absolutely mismatched things, second hand head to toe (or vintage as they say here) or something out-of-this-world eccentric, but it will work and it will look cool. Fashion in London is a work of art, a way of self expression, something taken as seriously as oral hygiene and afternoon tea.

As a result, shopping is a serious business here, and choice is enormous. It’s hard not to get sucked into the world of fast fashion and find yourself spending a lot on clothes and accessories. It’s equally hard to resist the appeal of luxurious brands (‘it’s an investment, baby’). Londoners make it look so easy.

There is planet, there is budget, there is limited storage space and there is not wanting to spend your hard earned pounds on smth you will only wear once. So here is my newly invented life hack – have a theme.

Decide what you are this year and buy only essentials that fit into the theme. The theme may be on fashion or not. As long as it works for you. My theme for this year is 3MS – Military, Matrix, Minimalist and Sci fi. Year is important because it protects you from seasonality of fast fashion. Essentials is another key word – only buy items that you need to fill the gap in your wardrobe. If you never wear skirts, don’t buy one. If you have 5 polo necks, you probably don’t need another one. If you have an item that does not go with anything, but you want to keep it, buy something to go with it. And so on.

Shopping when you have a theme is easy – you don’t overspend and you are in control. No to this girlie retro coat, no matter how cute or soft it is. No to these great shiny opulent heels. Yes to the grey chunky sweater (Matrix) and cool Alexander Wang like top (Minimalist).

Life simplified. Happy 🙂

Posted in everything else | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Let’s Call It A Life Experiment

I am staying with an Airbnb host for the first time. I am quite excited about it. My host is a lovely interesting woman, and overall I did enjoy the stay.

Where am I? In London, the one and the only. And here is the thing – I am coming back, soon.

My Dutch experiment proved to be just that – a 6 months life experiment. On reflection, it was a nice break, which provided plenty of perspective.

The irony of it is that I wanted a relaxed lifestyle and I did get just that in Holland. However it’s little things, little conveniences that I’ve grown so used to in the UK and realised their importance once I had to let them go in Holland. It’s subtle cultural differences. These things made all the difference.

London is far from ideal. Crime is high, politicians are mad and prices sky high. Yet somehow London, UK work for me. I feel at home here. It took relocating to Holland to realise that.

So this is my news. If my Easyjet flight back is not as bad as the one this way, I promise to write a detailed post about what these deal breaking little differences were.

Hope you are all well and whatever you are doing is going well. If not, just call it a life experiment, wrap it up and move on to something new 🙂

Posted in everything else | Tagged , | Leave a comment

The Secret To Successful Marriage And Relationship

A bit of an unusual post today. I don’t recommend books a lot. The last couple I’ve been on and on about were Power of Now and Escape Manifesto. But this book is amazing. If you are in a long term relationship, married for more than a couple of years and/or have kids, read on.

Love and sex. Intimacy and desire. There was so much said, debated, researched on these subjects. Yet judging by divorce rates, we are no happier. Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel is a genius new angle on what’s going wrong. The fastest, cheapest and best marital therapy you can find, in my opinion, and your significant other does not need to be involved.

If therapy is not your thing and you are lucky to be living in a marital bliss, then you can read for an interesting take on the state of modern marriage. It’s a very well written, well researched book, the author is a marital therapist with years of multi cultural experience and unusual view on things. I am reading it with interest and as I discovered a couple of life changing insights, I thought I absolutely had to share.

If you have no time to read, you can watch Esther Perel’s equally fascinating TED talk, which is how I was introduced to her ideas in the first place, although book obviously goes a lot deeper. You can also follow her on Twitter, where she shares the latest of her insight.

Hope you find it useful. Be happy!

Posted in love | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Dutch Geometry & Dinosaur Dreams

2013 Holland roofs

This week I have been a bit on fire art wise. Despite having no drawing or graphic skills whatsoever, I became possessed with drawing a night view from my window – the geometry of Dutch roofs does this to people. Several runs up and down the stairs to the bedroom, a tortured notebook and a couple of hours later I have birthed this, titled simply ‘Roofs’. Now a part of Volendam will always be with me I guess.

I have not stopped at this though. A couple of years ago I saw a dream with a dinosaur. And one moment was so vivid that it stayed with me forever. I always wanted to put it on paper but always found excuses not to, especially that I can not draw. So I did it digitally. Here is my Dinosaur Dream.

2013 dino dream bckgr 2

Posted in art therapy | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Change Is Our Everything

I am a big fan of Escape The City community and this picture of the week in their recent newsletter is just so spot on. I was going to post my latest piece on change for Hitrecord here anyway, here it is below. Whatever you are changing in you, your life or thinking, you are already half way there, because action ALWAYS beats inaction.
One thing we can be sure of is change. Last year I unleashed a roller coaster of change and I am still in a free fall. I had my up and down moments. Doubts did eat me alive and still occasionally have me for breakfast. Fears, anxiety, worries – radical change has strong side symptoms. God knows what shores I will end washed up on.
Like climbers need special equipment to keep them latched on to the mountain, we nomads of life require some anchors. A bit like that spinning top in the Inception. Two things keep me grounded during the change I am inflicting upon my life and myself – knowing that in the grand scheme of things it will all work out in the end (it may not be how I planned it, but it will definitely be as it was meant to be) and seeking out even more change, which paradoxically leads to some sort of balance. 
I am afraid, obviously, but not as much as of being stuck in the limbo, when things are not happening, when sails are down because there is no breeze, getting into routine, getting stale – no movement, boredom, predictability, I hate that. Change is my everything. But after a couple of exciting, tumbling, feet-onto-head months, I must say I am ready for the next plateau. Then, cycle repeats 🙂
Posted in anger, fear, kleshas | Tagged | 2 Comments

To All The Nomads Out There

I have installed Ted app on my smartphone. I should have done it long time ago really. Now instead of watching my favourite TV shows (which are on summer break anyway) before going to bed, or in other words passive media consumption 🙂  I watch Hitrecord (which will soon air on Pivot) and Ted. I ran into this video by Pico Iyer about what we call home in a modern reality of hyper mobility. And like a Kazakh with the British passport living in Holland with my Scottish husband, I could not agree more. Being nomadic, travelling a lot, living in different countries is great as long as you have found or are finding yourself. Because home is inside us. It’s who we are. If you move places searching for yourself, you are probably not doing it right. Watch this, it is a fantastic talk.

Posted in happiness | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Little Things, Joy And John Newman

IMG_0961

Since I started a family and had to become our financial manager, not very exciting things like budgeting, saving and meal planning became reality. All I can say – automation is key 🙂

I think I have proclaimed my recently acquired love for the £1 shops somewhere here already? Well, I found sort of an equivalent in my village 🙂  And this is what I found there lately! It’s a hedgehog tape measurer 🙂  How kawaii is this thing!?

What I am trying to say is that it is ok to derive joy from little things. And another great idea to boost happiness – listen to a song. I am currently obsessed with John Newman, this guy is like a cross between Amy Winehouse and Elvis Presley. He will be big. I LOVE this latest song of his.

Posted in happiness | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Something To Meditate To – Little Things

20130803-203857.jpg

Posted in quotes | 1 Comment

Are We Recording? Presenting Hitrecord

Universe works in mysterious ways. I have been having a go at freelancing on elance, and one of the projects I worked on was about millennials. I am not sure if I am one or if I am a Gen X’er, I am somewhere in between. Anyway. Through the research for this project I discovered some cool stuff like Complex magazine and Hitrecord project. With Hitrecord in particular, I wish I knew about it before!

Hitrecord is a brain child of Joseph Gordon Levitt who, as I always suspected, is a very cool guy. Hitrecord is basically a co-creation or crowdsourced art platform. It’s very, very indie, and so brilliant, check it out. The best kept secret, recently becoming more and more popular, with impressive quality of talent on the site.

I’ve done some writing, photography and even video blogging on Hitrecord, for the first time ever! Things that Hitrecord ‘makes’ you do 🙂  Check out their latest contribution request with the Fantasy Q&A. Ouch! 🙂  You can find my first ever cartoon there too. It’s just such an amazing project that you feel inspired to make art, whichever way you can. Check out my records here.

Everyone on the site is talented, and it’s hard to define top 3 or even 10 records. In fact, you can replace tv and whatever else you are watching online, with just watching/ reading other people’s art on Hitrecord. It’s so refreshing and so real.

Anyway. Here is the latest favourite record of mine called Evaporation, I mean how genius is this?

 

 

Posted in art therapy | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Always Start With Yourself

I talk about different things that make us happy here, on this blog. Self development or self improvement is a big one. At some point I read almost no fiction, and exclusively on self development. I complimented that with reading numerous blogs on the subject. And you know what – becoming more productive, smarter about life, discovering yourself and bettering yourself as a person does make you happy. Try it yourself. Pick up a self improvement book you always wanted to read and read it in a couple of days. If you need ideas, on my kindle right now is Just Get On With It by Ali Campbell. I’ll be posting more self development book ideas in future posts. In the meantime, enjoy this quote from The Hunting Happiness Project.

20130724-074410.jpg

Posted in quotes | Tagged , | Leave a comment

George Monbiot On Career Advice

I am going through a massive career change. I am trying to change what I do from corporate to impact. I am guided by the amazing Escape Manifesto, and still it’s not easy. Lots of stuff to figure out on your own. No one said it would be easy, right? At least I am making some pretty cool discoveries about myself, my values and motivations, and what I want in life.

I posted 14 Most Powerful Ted Talks For Disruptive Career Change before. And then I ran into George Mobiot’s career advice. Don’t ask me who the guy is, Wikipedia will advise better. All I know is he writes for Guardian, so I assume he is British, and he is what is now called a thought leader, which in his case means he is a great thinker with strong views and he can write. I loved his career advice so much, that I decided to cite it fully below.

Remember when you decide to change something about the work you do, that decision to change is already a massive first step. If you are currently also in transition, congratulations! May the change be as positive and transformational as you want it to be.

So my final piece of advice is this: when faced with the choice between engaging with reality or engaging with what Erich Fromm calls the “necrophiliac” world of wealth and power, choose life, whatever the apparent costs may be. Your peers might at first look down on you: poor Nina, she’s twenty-six and she still doesn’t own a car. But those who have put wealth and power above life are living in the world of death, in which the living put their tombstones – their framed certificates signifying acceptance to that world – on their walls.

Posted in money, work, downshifting | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Strategies For Happiness, Medical Angle

I must confess, I am a bit of a hypochondriac. I love reading about health, watching medical shows and I do follow a couple of doctors on twitter.

So for those of you preferring a medical angle on happiness, I absolutely have to share Strategies for happiness: 7 steps to becoming a happier person. Web MD is a go to destination for hypochondriacs 🙂 No, seriously, they produce great content. Easy to read and always informative.

I like how the article talks about genetic predisposition for happiness but also says that despite this, we can and should choose to be happy. My favourite is this quote by Dr Tom G Stevens: “Choose to make happiness a top goal. Choose to take advantage of opportunities to learn how to be happy. For example, reprogramme your beliefs and values. Learn good self-management skills, good interpersonal skills and good career-related skills. Choose to be in environments and around people that increase your probability of happiness. The people who become the happiest and grow the most are those who also make truth and their own personal growth primary values.”

This is essentially a one paragraph recipe for being happy. And it also sums up neatly some of the big themes we cover on this blog.

There are also several mentions of various books on happiness in the article. They all sound like worth checking out. Another one I recently came across is Mindful Compassion by the professor of clinical psychology at the University of Derby, Paul Gilbert, which he co-wrote with a Buddhist monk. He talks there about meditation on kindness.

I have to read it.

Posted in happiness | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

A Girl And A Camel Laughing Together

girl and laughing camel 2

This photo by Hancheng Li (my source for its origins is Quora however) cheers me up every time – it captures the essence of happiness beautifully – child like, innocent, in the now. I hope it makes you feel happier. High five, Universe, and have a terrific Sunday!

Posted in art therapy | Tagged , , | 10 Comments

Happy Blossoms

IMG_0817

In the village I live people seem to obsess about 3 things – cleanliness, windows decor and flowers. Everyone here has lots of flowers in their gardens. And because their gardens are open (facing the street, no doors), the flowers are for everyone to enjoy (as well as clean front terraces, windows and window decor).

I definitely don’t like cut flowers because I think it’s a waste. We kill a living creature and decorate our house with its body until it decomposes. Nothing romantic or nice about this. Living plants are a different thing, however they also die, before us, and this deterred me from having them for a while (also I am horrible at watering them regularly and so they die even faster 😦 ).

But having lived here for a couple of months – and read about ongoing demise of bees, poor things – I gave in. I accepted the short lived nature of living flowers. I accepted that they will die after a year and I will need to plant new ones. And so I got two. They are now sitting opposite my living room door and cheer me up whenever I look at them. Ah, the power of flowers (or any other live being) to give us happiness!

When I have time and space, I will plant my favourite blossoms – lilacs, acacia, cherry trees, jasmine, tulips, peony, and lots of wildflowers. The aromas that garden will have in spring and early summer!! Stay happy, fellow nomads, and get a living flower, if everything else fails to make you happy 🙂

Posted in happiness | Tagged , | Leave a comment

14 Most Powerful Ted Talks For Disruptive Career Change

If you are trying to radically change what you do (I am at the moment) or are thinking about it, this playlist should provide the ideas and inspiration. If you are an overnight success story or not, keep trying! How else will you know? 😉

Posted in money, work, downshifting, video & film | Tagged , , | 1 Comment