I’ve never had a big dream. I admire those who know what they want to achieve in life and have self-awareness and self-love to go for it. I did not have that. Instead, I had to figure out what makes a meaningful, fulfilling life, gradually and over the decades, within the constraints of my life, while figuring out how to pay bills.

This process involved getting to know who I was, untangling and deprogramming core beliefs, becoming aware of and facing my fears, and so on, while working full-time (which is a hell of its own).

I see young people online who live a “normal life” (or the “little life” as they call it) rather than strive to “follow one’s passion” (do you have one? I don’t) and “achieve success” (as in material success the way society defines it).

I talk to AI about different existential and spiritual questions. It can summarise swaths of knowledge in a second and give that useful external perspective. This is the summary of our conversation about living the “little life”:

Living a meaningful life doesn’t require having a big dream. It’s about finding purpose in the everyday, in the small moments, and in the things that bring you joy and satisfaction. It’s okay not to have big dreams — not everyone finds fulfilment in grand ambitions. What matters most is how you feel about your life and how you define success. If you feel dissatisfied, you may want to explore what could bring more meaning to your life. But if you’re content and feel balanced, then it is fine.

I’ve always admired downshifters, those who slow down, exit the “rat race,” opt out of over consumption, work addiction and obsession with money and experiment with slower, gentler ways of living.

They are rebelliously redefining success and what makes a life well lived. They ask important questions, like “Do I really want to be wealthy and famous or do I want to have a house in the woods and hang out with friends around the fire?” Or a recent one of my own: “Am I here to just enjoy cake?” 😊

Recently, I’ve realised that I achieved my biggest life ambition — my own place to live in an ok town with a large park nearby and sea not far, and my little family that I love. Health, a couple of great friends to talk to and hang out with occasionally. Doing something I enjoy daily. Books, plants, walking, travel. Oh, and cake, whenever scales permit 😊

Some questions AI suggested I think about to reflect on what makes a meaningful life for me:

1. What brings you joy? What activities, people, or routines make you feel content? No matter whether small or ordinary. Centre your life around who and what brings you joy.
2. Redefine success. Success doesn’t have to mean something huge or be tied to external achievement. Success could mean living true to oneself, building strong relationships or maintaining inner peace. What does success mean to you?
3. Embrace the journey. Enjoying the process of living day by day is more important than arriving at some specific dream or goal. It is less about the what and more about the how.