Strange things are afoot. A couple of years ago, I watched a documentary about an American shaman in Peru, Souther Hamilton, ayahuasca and his Blue Morpho retreat centre. It must still be somewhere on Youtube. Their ceremonies looked profound. More recently, I’ve listened to a podcast episode with Hamilton sent by a friend and wondered again what it would be like to take part in such a ceremony. Then one day, out of the blue, my fellow psychonaut has kindly extended me his spare ticket to a retreat by… Blue Morpho! The lockdown version is in a new, socially distanced, digital format, sans ayahuasca. But it is a good thing because a) I don’t need to travel all the way to Peru, b) I don’t have to worry about loosing my mind or c) having to wear an adult nappy (purging is strong with aya). I, of course, said YES immediately 🙂  

We start tomorrow. It’s a full-time, 3-day commitment, with ceremonies, meditation, trance, bodywork and dieta (fast). Three day integration is recommended afterwards. Tea is involved, although made out of more common (and legal) plants. My tea of choice will be a mix of Hawaiian red rose, jasmine and mallow which I got as a gift. I really can not wait to see if the flowers speak to me and whether it will be one plant, and then which one, or all of them.

I may have mentioned here that I considered a guided fast before (with Sura Detox centre in Devon), to learn to empty physically, to explore hunger spiritually, which for me as a post Soviet child is a terrifying prospect. From this perspective, fast is a welcome practice. Will I last? Will I give in? Will hunger drive me mad? Or will I get enlightened? We will see. I chose a beginner fast which means I can have two 500ml juices (vegan smoothies rather) a day and a “lemonade” – hot water with lemon and parsley. All while having my boys at home cook nice smelling, carb rich meals…

We shall see. Will I be a new person next week? What will I know that I don’t know now? Will it all be a waste of time? I honestly don’t know. Off I go, to chase a blue butterfly 🙂 Stay safe and sane wherever you are locked down!