It was always about the wolf. I was interested in shamanism for a while, occasionally read about it but never actually considered doing it. When I read about Lissa Rankin’s experience with a shamanic ritual in her book The Anatomy of a Calling, I was curious so I searched for shamans in the UK and was surprised to find a couple. It seemed so far fetched, I put it off again.

Recently I’ve been feeling drained of energy, running empty on joy – have I adulted too fast? Is this what life is for a married full time working parent? I lost my creative energy and I did not feel alive anymore. I did not thrive. I felt I needed help. I needed to heal. So I emailed a shaman.

I went and saw Jo Bowlby this week. In retrospect, it was an amazing, eye opening, life transforming, mind blowing experience that I should have done a year or more ago. I am buzzing with energy just writing this.

I blew my heart aches into a sacred stone. I ran with a jaguar in the jungle and flew with a condor in the sky. I was a hummingbird drinking the sweetness of life and a snake belly to belly with Mama Earth. I cried and cried and cried – a waterfall of tears washing my troubles away. My body shook as it released all problems, worries, negativity and tightness into the incense filled air filled with dancing rattles and Jo’s calming voice.

It was amazing. What I did not expect was that there would be talking. Most of it was me talking (and crying, uncontrollably!) and Jo listening. It took her 10min or so to know what I was and cut straight to the root of my problems. Therapy, coaching and spiritual healing wrapped into one. Mind blown.

After 2 hours I acquired the insight that would have taken me years to arrive at with meditation. New angles and new ideas expanded my mind while my soul felt renewed, soared with energy. It’s like Jo found and pressed a Reset button in me and I was transformed back to my previous, joyful self.

I came to the shaman with 2 problems – a writing block and feeling depleted of joy, energy. I left with so much more (marriage insights, understanding my fears better, advice on how to stick with writing). The most mind blowing thing was saved for the last – Jo said she saw a wolf in my energy, my aura. I instantly had goosebumps. I’ve always had a wolf present in my dreams, my work and the story that I am working on which I have a writing block with. Above is a short animation I made with friends a while ago and yes, it’s about a wolf.

Keep things and people that give you joy close. Like kilo Joules, let’s introduce a new energy unit kilo Joys. Measure everything in these. Life is not a walk in the meadow but maximise your joy as much as you can. Where there is joy, there is thriving. Where there is thriving, there is a happy life. And if you always wanted to see a shaman, go do it.